So I went for a haircut yesterday.....I intended to have a little more taken off than last time....but it's funny how that always seems to result in the complete and total deforestation of my hair. So, I'm no longer really a shaggy-haired lad, rebelling against society's ills. But the hair will be back....and it will have its revenge...in this, 2009, the Year of Vengeance!
Anyway...
Here's what's randomly on my mind this morning:
1. I have a tick bite on my leg that either has a red rash around it (indicating very bad things) or is irritated from all the constant scratching. Nothing seems to itch as intensely or for as long as tick bites!
2. When you're mowing so deep in a wooded area that the plant-life (I can't call it grass, because this was way beyond just grass) is as tall as the handle bars, it might be time to call in air support and just have the place napalmed. And to all the turtles I rescued from being eaten by the mower -- you're welcome! No, no - don't bother thanking me for saving your lives -- just hiss at me and slam shut the front door on your shells.
3. Has anyone seen the YouTube video on Shia Labeauf (sp?) where it's just 2 minutes of clips from his movies of him saying "No?" For those - like myself and the majority of male movie-goers out there - who can't stand him, it's an enjoyable experience and a demonstration of his oh-so-amazing acting range.
4. I've probably mentioned my little theory before, but I'll bring it up again: In order for a Hollywood actor to become one of the true "top dogs" he MUST win over the male audience. Crowe, Bale, Damon - they've all done this and are all at the top of the heap. The Shias and Orlando Blooms of the world will never be that successful unless or until they can make the average guy like them. Take Brad Pitt for example, he went from being a male-hated pretty boy to now being a guy's-guy actor noted for his talent and great role selection. It all started around the era of Se7en and Fight Club. He began showing the male audience a different side and we began to say, "alright, Pitt....maybe you're not so bad...maybe I could have a beer with you...fight a war with you...." How is this done? There is no set formula, but there are certain aspects to the roles an actor takes that can help accomplish this goal.
a) Be a viable "Badass." -- Just playing a role that features guns or swords isn't enough. In fact, doing so can expose an actor for being just another pretty boy male-model type that Hollywood is trying to force-feed to the general public. You have to be believeable. You have to be a man's-man - rugged, tough, the kind of guy you could depend on to lead you out of the wilderness after a plane crash - or help you fight off the street gang that is terrorizing your neighborhood. And you can't look pretty while doing it -- it's okay to look good - just not pretty. In fact, never look pretty if you want to win the male audience over. We hate that. It's why in the real world we say "I can't stand that pretty boy!" so derisively. An example of "Badass" -- pretty much any role Russell Crowe has played that involved swords, guns, or fighting of any kind. An example of Epic Fail Badass -- Orlando Bloom in "Kingdom of Heaven," Shia playing Indiana Jones' street-tough motorcycle-riding son in Indiana Jones 4, and George Clooney as Batman (but that was horrible for a lot of other reasons as well).
b) Be funny - but in a self-deprecating or off-the-wall kind of way. Don't be a punk! Nothing irritates the male audience quite like some young pretty boy who acts cocky and makes a bunch of smart-aleck remarks. Do this and you may have sealed your doom forever. (I'm looking at you, Shia...) An example of good humor: Vince Vaughn.
c) Be able to play a character as opposed to just another pretty romantic lead. Brad Pitt has played crazy serial killers, loons, devious figments of one's imagination railing against modern society, and even dim-witted personal trainers. He has taken on roles that require looking and acting like someone far less than a charming, handsome hero. And he's pulled them off successfully.
d) Take on roles that subsconciously will earn our respect. Jason Bourne? Maximus? The new gritty, more realistic Batman of Christian Bale? If these characters popped out of the screen and started walking around in our living rooms -- we would literally drop our popcorn bowl and follow them off on adventures. If Colin Farrell's Alexander came out of my tv screen I would hurl the popcorn bowl at him and demand my money back for seeing that WOAT movie in the first place.
4. I think I'm gonna start wearing half-shirts like Iceman and Slider in Top Gun. Or at least oil myself up each time before I play sand volleyball while Kenny Loggins' music plays in the background.
5. Okay - my attention span is gone. Everyone have a great weekend and be safe out there.
Showing posts with label actors. Show all posts
Showing posts with label actors. Show all posts
Friday, May 22, 2009
Tuesday, March 24, 2009
Escaping the Room of Scorn
As I was staggering about in the dark this morning, trying to make coffee and work out the tiredness and soreness from sleeping (what? everybody doesn't wake up more tired and sore than when they went to bed?), I was thinking about Liam Neesan and his wife's tragic passing. I recalled how it had taken a while for me to like Neesan. As an actor, he had to grow on me. But then I realized that that was the case with a majority of my favorite actors.
Matt Damon -- in "Good Will Hunting" he struck me as a pretty boy punk who'd always had it easy. Natural good looks and perhaps a pushy stage-mom can make up for talent or any other possible area where one might be lacking. I didn't hate the guy or anything, I just figured him for yet another of the pretty boy actors Hollywood churns out (which is also a prime reason why they have so few marketable leading male actors these days -- they went away from the Clint Eastwood and Harrison Fords who were appealing to both the male and female audience in favor of Ben Afflecks and skinny little male-models types who fail miserably when put in a role that requires being something other than pretty or having great hair.). But after a few years and a few good roles he had earned my respect and is now one of my favorites. Like Heath Ledger was in the process of doing, he had crossed the boundary from being loved by women and mostly scorned by men to universal acceptance. THAT is the key to being a leading male in Hollywood. I'm getting tired of having to scream it. Yet Hollywood keeps pumping out the same lame punks, year after year. That High School Musical kid, Ashton Kucher, Orlando Bloom, etc are all famous because they're appealing to girls. But men (by and large) can't stand these guys. Bloom has come very close to breaking out, but I think he would have to shave his head, adopt a sarcastic, I-don't-care attitude and then start taking quirky roles that highlight completely different aspects of his character than we have previously seen. Like Ledger taking on character-actor type roles - the opposite of a heroic leading man.
Brad Pitt is another who made his way out of my Room of Scorn and is now one of my favorite actors (Russell Crowe is probably my favorite who is still in his prime, Ford would have to get the all-time label due to his body of work). Pitt was insanely popular with the ladies when he first arrived on the scene. And this annoyed men greatly. But through wise choices in the roles he took and showing he could be a man's man he made a pioneering leap over the Fan Gender Gap. Once upon a time a guy wouldn't be caught dead claiming Pitt as one of their favorite actors. A blog such as this, printed out and rushed back through time via Trans-Temporal-FedEX (what? You've never used them? They're very handy and reliable. Especially when you absolutely, positively, HAVE to get a package back through time - on time!) a guy like me would be mocked and ridiculed for printing such praise of Pitt. I might even get ex-communicated from the Order of Manliness.
Back to my original thought, though: I never considered Neesan to be part of the pretty boy group. I just didn't care for him. Other actors who have overcome the Room of Scorn include:
Johnny Depp -- it's okay to like him now and even revere him as a guy's favorite actor. But there's still some of that pretty boy stink clinging to him. Somehow being Jack Sparrow solidified him both as a guy's-guy and as a sex symbol for the ladies. That's one remarkablely lucky role selection.
Christian Bale -- he's in a dead heat with Crowe for my favorite "current" actor crown and probably at the top of the heap in Hollywood right now. Any role he wants - he can have it. Superb actor and extremely versatile. However, there was a time when I didn't like him. It was only a brief period of time and my level of dislike was rather small. But I did dismiss him because of his pretty boy status. And he quickly won me over and the hearts, minds, and wallets of America.
Roberty Downey, Jr. -- not only was the guy a star from the 80s (that's one strike), but he was always relapsing into drug problems and being given 2nd, 3rd, 45th chances by Hollywood (another strike with the guys - guys who seem to be of the mindset that an actor who does drugs should be able to handle it and just shut up about it), and to top it off he had made his star by being a pretty boy and protraying a cocky, smart-aleck persona in most of his roles. Not winning over the guys that way. But then this past year he rose from the depths of Scorn-dom and in one summer won a tentative place in the esteem of the male audience. His roles in Iron Man and Tropic Thunder showed a completely different side of RDJ. Or at least a side the male audience had never seen before. We haven't fully bought-in to him yet, he's still on a probationary status, but with future roles in Iron Man sequels looming, he's probably a safe bet to be in our good graces down the road.
Well, that's enough of that. I don't know where these topics come from sometimes. I need more coffee...
Matt Damon -- in "Good Will Hunting" he struck me as a pretty boy punk who'd always had it easy. Natural good looks and perhaps a pushy stage-mom can make up for talent or any other possible area where one might be lacking. I didn't hate the guy or anything, I just figured him for yet another of the pretty boy actors Hollywood churns out (which is also a prime reason why they have so few marketable leading male actors these days -- they went away from the Clint Eastwood and Harrison Fords who were appealing to both the male and female audience in favor of Ben Afflecks and skinny little male-models types who fail miserably when put in a role that requires being something other than pretty or having great hair.). But after a few years and a few good roles he had earned my respect and is now one of my favorites. Like Heath Ledger was in the process of doing, he had crossed the boundary from being loved by women and mostly scorned by men to universal acceptance. THAT is the key to being a leading male in Hollywood. I'm getting tired of having to scream it. Yet Hollywood keeps pumping out the same lame punks, year after year. That High School Musical kid, Ashton Kucher, Orlando Bloom, etc are all famous because they're appealing to girls. But men (by and large) can't stand these guys. Bloom has come very close to breaking out, but I think he would have to shave his head, adopt a sarcastic, I-don't-care attitude and then start taking quirky roles that highlight completely different aspects of his character than we have previously seen. Like Ledger taking on character-actor type roles - the opposite of a heroic leading man.
Brad Pitt is another who made his way out of my Room of Scorn and is now one of my favorite actors (Russell Crowe is probably my favorite who is still in his prime, Ford would have to get the all-time label due to his body of work). Pitt was insanely popular with the ladies when he first arrived on the scene. And this annoyed men greatly. But through wise choices in the roles he took and showing he could be a man's man he made a pioneering leap over the Fan Gender Gap. Once upon a time a guy wouldn't be caught dead claiming Pitt as one of their favorite actors. A blog such as this, printed out and rushed back through time via Trans-Temporal-FedEX (what? You've never used them? They're very handy and reliable. Especially when you absolutely, positively, HAVE to get a package back through time - on time!) a guy like me would be mocked and ridiculed for printing such praise of Pitt. I might even get ex-communicated from the Order of Manliness.
Back to my original thought, though: I never considered Neesan to be part of the pretty boy group. I just didn't care for him. Other actors who have overcome the Room of Scorn include:
Johnny Depp -- it's okay to like him now and even revere him as a guy's favorite actor. But there's still some of that pretty boy stink clinging to him. Somehow being Jack Sparrow solidified him both as a guy's-guy and as a sex symbol for the ladies. That's one remarkablely lucky role selection.
Christian Bale -- he's in a dead heat with Crowe for my favorite "current" actor crown and probably at the top of the heap in Hollywood right now. Any role he wants - he can have it. Superb actor and extremely versatile. However, there was a time when I didn't like him. It was only a brief period of time and my level of dislike was rather small. But I did dismiss him because of his pretty boy status. And he quickly won me over and the hearts, minds, and wallets of America.
Roberty Downey, Jr. -- not only was the guy a star from the 80s (that's one strike), but he was always relapsing into drug problems and being given 2nd, 3rd, 45th chances by Hollywood (another strike with the guys - guys who seem to be of the mindset that an actor who does drugs should be able to handle it and just shut up about it), and to top it off he had made his star by being a pretty boy and protraying a cocky, smart-aleck persona in most of his roles. Not winning over the guys that way. But then this past year he rose from the depths of Scorn-dom and in one summer won a tentative place in the esteem of the male audience. His roles in Iron Man and Tropic Thunder showed a completely different side of RDJ. Or at least a side the male audience had never seen before. We haven't fully bought-in to him yet, he's still on a probationary status, but with future roles in Iron Man sequels looming, he's probably a safe bet to be in our good graces down the road.
Well, that's enough of that. I don't know where these topics come from sometimes. I need more coffee...
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